Monday, March 4, 2013
Observations on THE WAY IT IS
People are just funny. And, boy do I love to watch people. A lot of behaviors I have observed are kind of quirky. Some actions are unique to only males or females. The stereotypes we have about men and women are truly based in a lot of reality.
Other behaviors are totally absent of any gender basis. In our household, there are certain behaviors of which any one of us may be guilty, male or female. Given the circumstance, you always just do that, or you just say that.
Some of my observations are just a commentary on THE WAY IT IS, and other things I've noticed seem to have an UNSPOKEN RULE governing them. Either way, I'm sure you'll see yourself or your loved ones in some of the things I will list here.
1. Upon entering a public restroom with a friend, given three stalls, two women will automatically use #1 and #3.
2. If two guy friends go to see a movie together, they will require three seats in order to leave a space between them.
3. If a party invitation suggests "bringing something to share," the girls will bake something, typically decorated cupcakes or a variety of brownies. The guys will bring a bag of Doritos.
4. Have you ever seen any person ever step on gum and not say a string of illegal words?
5. If you force your man to stop and ask for traveling directions, the next hour of your drive will be unpleasant in numerous ways.
6. It is the manly thing to turn up your nose when served quiche, whether or not it tastes good.
7. It is always somebody else who drank the last of the milk/juice/tea in the frig.
8. One would not want to take the trash out when it is simply full up to the top of the container. It's not truly full until not one more item can be precariously balanced up on top of the rest.
9. A man shall never bother reading assemblage directions.
9a. Ignore any leftover pieces too.
10. For men: If dirty socks land in the general vicinity of the hamper, that's good enough.
10a. For women: If dirty socks continually land outside of the hamper, that's grounds for divorce.
12. Do not stare at any male wearing a Speedo. Quickly look away.
How do things work in your home? Any quirky behaviors? If so, please share them. I could use a good laugh today.