Thursday, November 14, 2013

The Lonely Husband

 lonely man sitting on bench
Son Caleb and his puppy and I will be leaving again today, heading for a furniture shopping excursion and a check on the progress of our building project up on the mountain.

Hubby will be left home alone, as he has to work today and tomorrow.

I know my husband well, and I can probably predict with nearly 100% accuracy how his time alone here at the house will go.

Today, after work he will come home to a quiet and empty house.  While he removes his work shoes, he will miss the dog's daily attempts to lick clean the bottom of his shoes.  (He works in a food manufacturing plant.)

He will plop into his favorite chair, and begin relaxing by mindlessly playing some games on his ipad.

After a while he will feel hungry, and although there are plenty of ingredients in the frig and pantry to put a decent meal together, he will go out for dinner.  Probably to get a Subway sandwich.  Specifically tuna on wheat.

Later, although he detests doing any errands after he is settled in for the night, and especially fighting the crowds at large shopping venues, he will venture out  to see if Edy's ice cream is on sale.

Whether it is on sale or not, some of it will follow him home, and he will turn the tv on and settle in with a massive bowl of ice cream.

He will watch a marathon of Crime Scene Investigator type shows, continuing until he nods off and is later awakened by somebody snoring or passing gas.  Only then will he drag himself upstairs and put himself to bed.

He will pull my pillow over next to his body while he sleeps.

Tomorrow morning, because it is Friday, somehow that will justify his not packing his lunch and thinking to himself that he will just buy something there at work.

The after work cycle will repeat itself, with one modification.  I predict dinner will be at Red Robin, and he will eat the hamburger special, as always.

Again, the ice cream.  Again, the crime shows.  Again, the pillow in bed.

He will plan on sleeping in on Saturday morning, yet will arise no later than 7:00 AM.  Starting work at 5:00 AM for years will do that to you.

Saturday morning he will head down to our local diner for breakfast.  He likes going there, especially because the waitresses fuss over him.  I am wise enough to know they are working for tips.

The entire time I am gone, he will not accomplish any of the minor house and yard projects that are on our  Ta Do List.   He will tell me he meant to, but just didn't get around to them.

He will not have put his dirty dishes in the dishwasher.  He will tell me he was going to, but that I came home ahead of his schedule.

He probably won't even have taken a shower, asking me why he should, as there was nobody here to impress.

He will most likely be asleep in his favorite chair when I get home, because, well....

he missed me terribly.

And that's OK.


  1. Your husband sounds like me. I love the Thursday night TV crime shows and I love Subway's tuna subs and ice cream!

  2. That sounds just like our house. Especially the ice cream and sleeping in the chair.

  3. Interesting how well you know him...almost as if you were there! I would love to hear if he changed his routine and shocked you by doing a couple of things on the Ta Do list...